Many people take comfort in remembering and commemorating their passed loved ones on special days.

It might be the date of their passing, a birthday, a special anniversary, seasonal days such as Mother’s and Father’s Day, Christmas and Easter. Or it might just be that on a particular day you are having stronger feelings and memories of your loved one and yearn to have a deeper connection.

No matter what the occasion, visiting the place where your loved one has come to finally rest can provide comfort and a softness to the sadness you may be feeling.

So, what about when you cannot visit this special place to connect with your loved one.

There are many different ways you can still connect, reflect and share memories while you take a moment to remember your loved one.

• Light a candle and place next to a photo of your loved one for the day. The flicker of the candle will also provide beauty and serenity.

• Cook your loved one’s favourite meal and share with your household. There’s nothing like aroma and taste to evoke memories and therefore some hearty chatter about your loved one.
  
  
• Phone or facetime friends and family members who also shared beautiful memories – reminisce and share photos – you might even see some photos from others that you have never seen before.

• Share a post on your social media with a great display of photos and meaningful words. If your loved one spoke a different language, perhaps write something in their language. You will be surprised how many others will share their well wishes, their own memories or even their own experiences.

• Write a poem or memoir piece; paint a picture or write a song. (This is of course a great one for the creatives.) The end result can be shared with other friends, or can be taken graveside at a later date to read, sing or share.

• If possible, visit a nearby outdoor place that was special to your loved one. Reflect on memories or simply sit in a quiet place in your home or yard where you can take a moment.

• Plant a plant in your garden or in a pot. The plant can become another memorial area for you in the future.

• Pull out some old photos and play music that reminds you of your loved one. Sit around your lounge room with the old record player (or download onto your device) and listen to those old tunes while you sort through photos. If your photos are on a device, create an online slide show and cast to your TV.

This is a challenging time and missing special days and anniversaries can add to your sadness. It’s important to take a moment to still remember and cherish the time spent with your loved one. You can then plan a day in the not too distant future where you can visit their special place again soon.

You can also read about ways to celebrate the life of a loved one who has just passed when unable to attend their funeral here https://www.smcnsw.org.au/.../when-you-cant-attend-the...